On this day, Dec. 23rd, 20 years ago we stood around my father’s bed in the ICU watching his blood pressure and heart rate slowly drop drop drop like a clock winding down until it went to zero. We had asked for no life saving maneuvers, no resuscitation. There was no way to save him. Instead we held his hand, hugged him and kissed him as we watched his body slowly shut down. No one tells you what to expect when you see someone die. In the movies it’s usually either peaceful